Burn This Out
by E.T Boyle
Summary: "Tori fucking Vega who came into your life as suddenly as the tornado that swept Dorothy to Oz and changed everything you ever thought you knew." Rated M for later chapters and Language.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I'm taking a wee break from my other Jori story, and this idea came to me. I'll probably update this a lot sooner than my other story. Don't freak out I haven't abandoned it, I'm just figuring out how to develop it. Anyway, This is short as it is a prologue. If you'd like me to continue drop a review! A I ave chapter 1 wrote already! On with the show.**

**Slán**

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**Burn this Out.**

_Prologue._

You've learned a great deal about Tori Vega, in the two years that you've known her. You know more about her than you'd ever like to admit. You know that she takes two sugars in her tea, you know that she hates shrimp, you know that she cares more, you know shes strong like a bonfire that burns the whole night and still has small embers of flame at the bottom burning slowly for days after. You know that her mouth forms an 'o' shape when she reaches climax and you know that she will never admit how she secretly likes horror movies or how much she enjoy's it when you massage her scalp.

You remember that first day you met, how could you forget? Auburn hair drenched in your cold coffee as she cowered on the floor pleading with you. You felt a sick tinge of pride that you'd never felt before, at the sight of her practically begging for forgiveness and to be your friend, after you had drenched her in a beverage in front of your class mates. You were always bitter of course, but never as bad, until you met _her. _There was something that kept pulling you towards her and it killed you, it burned your heart and scrambled your mind until you gave in and tried with her. Well, you tried as much as you could with her. She was always sweet and caring and you were bitter and cold. You two were two sides of the spectrum and it annoyed you that fate had slowly pushed you together. At the beginging you hated Tori, you hated how she crashed into Hollywood Arts with this vibrant light that wouldn't go away. You hated how she shimmed her way into your group of friends. You hated how she had the most flawless cheekbones known to man. You hated how she always wanted to be your friend. You hated how sure of herself she was. You hated how she fought you back, no matter what you threw at her. You hated her. At least you thought you did.

Tori Vega was a burden on you, as far as you were concerned. She stole the lead in plays that you normally would have gotten. She stole your friendship with Cat. She made your boyfriend fall in love with her. She was simply a pain in your fucking ass and not the good kind. She enraged you, she provoked you and for some reason it made you _want _to know her. You could never tell her that, of course. As far as anyone knew you hated her. She kind of hated you. Her hatred was less powered, it was a tickling feeling in the back of her throat that wouldn't go away but that she didn't mind having. The thing about Tori was that, you could throw any obstacle her way and she could move around it gracefully and it irked you. It irked you, it enraged you and it made you curious. You had perfected the most believable bad-girl-goth facade and she zoomed in with her chisle and chipped away at it, piece by piece.

Who was Tori Vega? You thought she was simply a perfect girl with perfect cheekbones who moved to school sophomore year and kissed your boyfriend on the first day. You never knew she would have this effect on your life. You never knew she would plunge her fingers through your chest, take your heart and keep it locked away. You never knew she would make you fall in love, never mind fall in love with her. But she did. You hated her more for it. For making you _feel_, a thing you had become so used to not doing. You loved her for it at the same time.

Tori fucking Vega who came into your life as suddenly as the tornado that swept Dorothy to Oz and changed everything you ever thought you knew.


	2. Chapter 2

**A:N/ Chapter One. The more reviews I get the faster I will upload. All mistakes are mine. Enjoy and review. **

**Slán**

Chapter One.

You spent the first six months that you knew Tori, hating her, to put it simply. You threw vicious words at her every chance you got to. You made it your mission to ruin her day. To make her feel like she wasn't the most flawless human you had ever seen. You thought your words and antics would eat away at her, over time. You thought you had every right to treat her how you did. She crashed into your life, stole your boyfriends heart and ruined pretty much everything you knew. Although Beck stayed with you for the first six months that you knew Tori, you felt the love that was once there slowly disintegrate into a pile of ashes at the bottom of your heart. It should have hurt you a great deal more than it did when Beck left you, and it confused you that it didn't. This is where the dynamics of everything began to change. Where cracks began to appear in your solid pyramid, where imperfections trudged through your concrete walls that held them captive and revealed them selves to the world.

The changes were clear when the seventh month that you knew Tori came around. She was having a party for some reason that you didn't care enough to know. You only agreed to attend because Cat had asked you, whether or not you'd like to admit it, Cat held a special place in your cold heart, so you went with her. The party was full of people, many you didn't know, two tables were full of bottles upon bottles of alcohol, music pumped loudly from a speaker somewhere in the kitchen as bodies danced in the living room. You were impressed that Tori had it in her to throw a party of this kind. You poured yourself a solo cup of vodka and sipped it as you scanned the dance floor. Red hair swung and you knew it was Cat. You found your eyes trailing up a pair of tan legs that seemed to last for miles, you scanned a toned uper body as it swayed to the beat and finally you landed on a face that you had become to hate. _Tori. _Her auburn locks cascaded around her perfectly sculped face, a pair of arms reached above her head, as she twirled. You were enchanted, as you watched her dance. She caught your eyes, and you smirked, a wicked look that many feared. Tori exited the makeshift dance floor and saunted towards where you were standing, at the drinks table.

"Hey Jade." She said in a voice that reminded you so much of soft velvet as she poured herself a drink of some brown liquid you couldn't identify, she knocked the drink back in one swift motion.

"Vega." You replied dryly using the nickname you knew she hated, a hint of malice in your voice. She looked at you as though contemplating what to do or say next. She exhaled a shaky breath as she spoke next.

"Walk with me?" She asked in a voice that was so innocent and unsure. Unsure was something that Tori Vega was not and you replied before you even thought about it. You nodded your head with much more enthusiasm than you would have liked to display. The grin that spread across her face was blinding as she pulled you by the wrist towards her back yard. Surprisingly for a party, the back yeard was vacant, but then again it was a winters night. She released your hand and you both began walking.

"What did you want Vega?" You tried to sound bored you're not quite sure if it was convincing. You felt her shift from her left foot to her right foot.

"I just wanted to talk." Tori says so nochalantly. You nod your head again and she continues. "Why do you hate me?" Her voice sounded so weak and you stopped dead on the pathway in her back yard. You tortured her every chance you got, but you never asumed you'd have to answer _why._ She looked at you with nothing but curiousity as you contemplated running away or answering her.

"You really want to know _why_ I hate you?" Your mouth twitched and she nodded. You took a deep breath as she shuffled from foot to foot, anxiously chewing on a plump lip. "I thought I hated you because you came to Hollywood Arts and took everything I had. Lead roles, Cat, Beck but it wasn't that. I hate you because you're everything I'm not. You're pure and golden and I'm well, I'm sinful and a pile of ashes. You're perfect and I'm immensely flawed, and you care about things and I don't. You can love and I don't think I ever can. And, and you're just _fuck_, you're everything I wish I was and everything I wish I had. I _fucking _hate you for it." Your hand grapsed the plastic cup tighter as you bit back tears after poruing your heart out to _Tori Vega_ of all people. Tori had a look of confusion, adoration and rage plastered on her face all at once.

"You mean to tell me, you hate me because you're jealous?" She asked as her brows knitted together. Your grip on the plastic cup tightened even more and your fingers pierced the plastic as the cold liquid smothered your fingers.

"No, I hate you because, Your what I _want_!" You practically screamed as rage over took your body. Tori looked even more confused than she did before. You were too angry to even realise what you had just said.

"Do you know how hard to is to have someone crash into your life and change everything you know? Do you know how it feels to be so unsure of yourself, to have questioned everything you've done? I _fucking _hate that I want you. I _hate _ that it feels as though you're in my veins and I can't get you out. I fucking hate that I can't stand the thought of you, but that I can't live without the thought of you!" Malice. Pure malice laced your voice along with venom. You visbly shook with rage. It was more than you could take. Tori finally spoke, her voice soft and vunerable.

"Y-You want me?" Tori sounded so small. She sounded miles away. So far yet so close. You nodded in confirmation you weren't sure if you could trust your voice, as she sighed. In relief? In annoyance? You'll never know. She took a step closer, her hand placed delicately on your upper arm. Even through your long sleeve you felt the burn of her skin, it was like a blaze of fire on your own skin. Everything about Tori burned. She was a fire that you couldn't put out no matter how many times you stood on it or no matter how many buckets of water was thrown at it at. It burned anyway.

You raised your head and you melted as your vision landed on a pair of brown eyes that held nothing but adoration and love. You had never seen anything like it. Not with Beck, not with anyone. It scared you, you wanted to run. The logical thing to do would be to run. Every nerve in your body screamed '_Run Jade, run."_ You stayed put, almost as if you were being pulled to her by some magnetic force.

You closed your eyes and you felt warm, burning flesh pressed to your mouth. _Lips._ Lips that burned your own. They created a fire as they moved against your own. Delicately burning a hole through your heart with each press to your mouth. A raging flame trying to burn you out. Trying to melt the ice burg that blocked it's route. It was then that you realised how cold you were. How different you were. How different from you Tori were. She was fire and you were ice and it wasn't supposed to work. You were made to fight, to hate eachother not love eachother. You felt hot hands on your neck and you winced as she scarred your skin with her touch. It was painful in the most pleasureable way. You became addicted and you never wanted to let that fire go.

As you stood on a cold winter night, vodka on your hands and Tori Vega's warm tongue in your cold mouth, thats when you realised things would never be the same, that all dynamics had changed forever. That maybe fire and ice could live as one, as a stream of steam.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I had this chapter written as well so I guessed I'd upload it. I changed the rating, due to this chapter, it's smutty and intense, so yeah, enjoy and review. **

**Slán**

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Chapter Two.

When Tori released her grip on the back of your neck, you sighed as that sensational burn vanished. Tori reluctantly stepped back from you as she ran a shaky hand through auburn locks. You starred at the ground not being able to grasp what had happened. You kissed Tori Vega, or rather she kissed _you_, but you let her and you kissed _her_ back. It was unlike anything you had ever experienced. It was warm and sensual and it burned your skin, it set your senses a light and you were enveloped into the sizzle of heat that was Tori, and you liked it. You actually _liked_ it. Tori starred at you with confusion and lust swirling around pools of brown.

"I-I, Tori, I have to go." You whispered and you almost kicked yourself for stuttering. You took one look at the girl in front of you, Hair dishevled, lips plump and eyes you couldn't look into, before you ran. You ran from the pavement of her back yard, your shoes scraping the gravel as you dragged your feet, green flashes in your eyes. You swam through the dancing bodies and ran through the front door. The air felt crisp and frosty on your skin, you automatically relaxed as you remembered that cold was what you are and it was welcoming you home. You felt the warmth of her dissipate as you ran in the cold. You ran in the dark, the only source of light coming from the street lamps that lined the streets you ran upon. You ran until your lungs felt like they could collapse. You loved to run. It gave you a sense of freedom, you felt as if you could run forever and never turn back, as though running could bring you to a much better destiny. You cleared the fog that was closing in on your mind as you ran. You couldn't bare to think about _her. _Not now. Not knowing what her warmth felt like, what her lips felt like, how she knew what was going on with you. So you continued to run, you ran until morning, until the birds were singing and all warmth was gone from your body.

You didn't see Tori again until the following monday at school. You were sat at your normal table, with your normal group of friends, that sadly included Tori. You didn't even have it in you to greet her with an insult. You made sure you were sat at the edge of the bench with Cat to your side, you weren't sure if you could bare Tori's warmth. It was _too_ inviting, _too _welcoming, you could feel it _screaming_ at, you could feel that magnetic force in the distance slowly pulling you _closer _to her and it scared you. She was laughing with André about something stupid but the sound was so melodic, it was like a chorus of angels singing and you had never realised it before. You found yourself starring at her face and taking everything about her in and _that_, scared you even more.

"I have a project to finish I'll see you losers later." You declared as you walked away from the group. You lied but you could feel that pull of warmth and you had to escape. You slowly felt the ice melt and it frightened you. You walked until you reached the Black Box Theatre, thankful that it was empty. You perched yourself atop the catwalk and began cutting some paper with a pair of red scissors Cat had bought you. You were cutting your tweleth page when you heard the door creak open and a pair of sneakers squeek on the linoleum floor. You didn't bother looking, you guessed who ever it was had enough sense to leave Jade West and her scissors alone.

"Jade, I-" There it was. That velvet like voice that made your ears bleed in a beautiful way. You closed your eyes and enhaled a shaky amount of air before you looked down at the girl.

"What Vega?" You barked, trying to fill your voice with as much venom as you could muster(Which at this present moment wasn't a lot) as you placed your scissors back in your bag.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay cos we haven't talked since-" You cut her off, your tone strenghthening as you spoke, your legs stretching over the balcony of the catwalk.

"There is _nothing _to talk about Vega, besides we never talk anyway!" You exclamied annoyance creeping into your tone.

"Oh c'mon, stop playing coy you know what I want to talk about." Tori folded her arms over her chest in a stubborn manner, you asumed she wasn't leaving anytime soon so you made your way onto the ground and stood a metre or two away from her.

"Okay you wanna talk, lets talk." You spat at her as you matched her stance, arms folded firmly over your chest, a studded eyebrow arched as she sighed.

"We-I-we kissed _Jade._" She uttered the last word in a whisper as a blush coated her face. You laughed inwardly.

"It was only a kiss." You quipped with a dry chuckle. She studdied your expression with a look of concern etched onto her flawless face. Her lip cluctched between teeth as she sighed.

"Look, you know what I don't care, I just want to know _why." _She said as she took a step closer to you. You growled, typical Tori always questioning and never just acting. You uncrossed your arms, and ran a hand through your raven hair.

"It was nothing." You replied in a bored tone, fisted clenched at your sides.

"Don't lie." Another step closer.

"I'm not." Another step.

"You are." Suddenly you were enveloped in a deep heat, melting your skin, clouding all your senses and you were backed up against a wall, warmth every where, everything you could feel was warm.

Hot plump lips closed around your own set of cold ones, creating a puff of lukewarm steam between the two bodies. You felt a warm hand grasp your hips as nails dug into your flesh through your clothing, a small animalist moan vibrated through your mouth as you were met with a warm tongue. You suddenly became aware of the situation and snapped. You forced Tori against the wall, fighting her heat with your coldness. You latched on to her neck, biting and nipping as warm hands tangled in your raven locks.

"You" nip "Want." bite "Me." suck "To tell you why I kissed you back?" You asked as you continued your assualt on the tan girls neck making sure to leave a trail of marks. She nodded lightly. You pulled back ever so slightly, allowing yourself to look at her face, to look into those pools of brown, to memorize her. Her hair was a mess and her lipstick was smeared, her breath laboured and for this first time in your life you thought someone looked _beautiful. _Your lips were but a centimetre apart when yoou spoke, with each word your lips ever so slightly brushed Tori's, frost mixing with heat.

"I kissed you out of hatred. Because you burn my skin, you burn my heart and your taste burns my own mouth and its intoxicating, I kissed you because it means nothing, because I feel nothing but the burning." She swallowed loudly as she took in your words. You contemplating kissing her again but you couldn't bare the burn.

Slowly you dragged your hand south, fingers nipping at the skin on her stomach as you raised her top. She was so _warm_ and you were so cold, again you reminded yourself that it was wrong, yet you continued. You stalled when you got to the waistband of her jeans, her eyes were stut and her head lolled to the side, you stroked above the waistline and you heard her breath hitch. You stalled on the button of her jeans, giving her a chance to pull out. Your body screamed "_This wrong Jade!_" But you chose to ignore it as you carefully undid the button and zipper on her jeans, you manuvered them down slightly off her hips. You pressed a hard kiss to her neck, biting and nipping as she moaned softly her hands tangling into your hair. You slid your hand into her panties and you were met with soft, slick, _heat._ You couldn't help the animalistic groan that escaped your mouth as you stroked her. Her grip in your hair tightened, as her hips bucked into you.

"You like that Vega?" You growled into her ear as you slowly circled her clit, smothering your hand in her juices as the other held her lower back. "Like that this is nothing?" you asked as you teased her center, dipping slightly inside her, only to pull out.

Without warning you plunged two slender cold fingers into the slick heat of her core. She moaned softly and you growled as your fingers created a steady pace inside of her, stretching soft tissue with gasps of pleasure in between. "_Oh fuck Jade!" _she moaned into your ear, a breath of hot air enveloping you as you thrusted faster and deeper into her, curling your fingers where she needed it. You pressed hard bites to her neck, making sure to mark her. To remind her hot flesh that the cold was here and the cold will bite you.

Your hand flooded in the warmest juices you had ever felt, and she climaxed with her mouth in an 'o' shape and your name falling from her lips. You continued to thrust as the waves of pleasure over took her. You pulled your hand away from her core and starred at your fingers as they glistened. You wipped them on her shirt as she starred at.

"That was nothing." You whispered just as the bell rang. You lifted your bag, slung it around your shoulder, took one last look at the recovering girl pressed to the wall and walked out of the Black Box Theatre. Coated in Tori Vega, basked in a sickening heat, mind foggy from the warmth, as you made your way to your next class, a devilish smirk plastered on your face, as you realised the cold had conquered.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** I know I promised to update daily but, I had a lot to do yesterday, like go and collect and KINGS OF LEON TICKET! Yeah thats right. This chapter is a lot longer, but idk I like it. So here is chapter three, I'm pleased with the response so far, thank you all!

Slán!

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Chapter Three.

You had walked the halls of Hollywood Arts the past week with more confidence than you ever had, simply because you had gotten one over on Tori Vega. The cold had fought back and refused to allow the heat to thaw its surface and you felt notorious. You had smirked more than you had since the party, you had been ten times more ruthless than usual, and you noticed that you had an extra spring in your step. What could possibly bring you down? _Tori Vega. _

You had noticed the following day after your antics in the BlackBox Theatre that she wouldn't even look at you. Not during class, not in the hallway, not during lunch. She was ignoring you, and it irked you. For some alien reason, you had tried reaching out to her. Made a point of directing insults to her, trying to catch her eye, that only seemed to add fuel to her ever burning fire, as she continued to ignore you. You could feel that intoxicating warmth whenever she was near. It was a constant reminder to your senses. Everything that was warm reminded you of Tori, of how she _felt, _how she smelt and it was eating you alive. You had scrubbed your body that night when you left Blackbox Theatre. You had burned your skin with hot water and it did nothing but remind you off her. You scrubbed your skin until it was raw trying to rid yourself of her, but nothing worked. She was everywhere but nowhere all at once. Her nails trailed across your skin and her breath brushed your ear, but she was never there. You felt as if you had created an illusion of Tori Vega, of this blasting heat that felt _so good_ but you knew was _so wrong. _Your mind screamed _'Back off Jade, back off_." But your body worked off its own accord. You didn't understand what it meant. Why this magnetic force you felt yourself being warped into lately, was constantly pulling you towards Tori.

You speed through suburban L.A, your foot pressed hard to accelerator, knuckles turning white as you gripped the steering wheel. Kings of Leon blasted from the stereo, their sweet sounds normally calming you, doing nothing for your state mind. The lights from the busy city nothing but blurs as your car speeds, way past the limit. Houses and trees, nothing but blurs of colour. Rain pelting your windscreen as it fell hard only to be pushed away by your window wiper, lines of the acid water left on the windscreen. Rage over took your system as you turned left and started following a somewhat familiar route. You began to slow down as you entered the street, making sure to park out of sight of the house. The rain was still falling heavily as you reluctantly pulled yourself from the car, heavy boots dragging along the pavement, door slamming behind you as you walked slowly towards house at the end of the street. Rain soaked through your clothes, your hair stuck to your face as the wind blew harshly. You could see a bedroom lit up along with the living room as you neared. Fist clenched, mind blank as you walked up the garden and towards the front door. You knocked three times before you received an answer. A tired looking Tori answered the door. Her cell phone clutched in her hand, small framed glasses perched on her nose, sweatpants on her legs. IT either took her a minute to realize it was you or she honestly was lost for words. When you assumed she wasn't going to speak, you lifted your left arm in the direction of her living room and she moved aside to allow you in. Warmth enveloped you. Not the kind of warmth you had come accustomed to by being with Tori, but a warmth of family, of love, that you weren't used to.

You perched yourself on the arm of the chair nearest the kitchen, not caring about your wet body or state of mind. Tori stood next in front of you, a blue towel clutched in her hand, as she hesitantly passed it to you. You grabbed it with a curt nod of the head, not planning on using it as you stared blankly at Tori, who had a look of confusion and sympathy etched across her face. She simply stood peering at you, her mouth opening and closing. Even in your state you had it in you to answer the question she was dying to ask.

"My dad came home." You said it so simply, yet your eyes conveyed so much. Tori moved and before you knew it she was by your side, her hand running along your cold arm in a comforting manner. Your cold flesh suddenly became warm and you felt your skin melted into Tori's as she sighed. No one had ever met either of your parents, not even Beck, no one had ever been to your house. No one ever questioned you about your family, it was almost an unwritten rule amongst your friends. Tori said nothing she simply rubbed your arm as the rain dripped from the ends of your hair to the wooden floor.

"I haven't seen him in seven years and he just, _fucking_ appears as if nothing has changed." You spoke through clenched teeth as your body tensed just thinking of your old man.

"I don't know what to say Jade, I never- no one ever speaks about your home life." You could hear and feel the sadness laced with that welcoming warmth as she spoke while by your side. You nodded not knowing where to begin, not knowing why you came _here_, why you found s_olace _here.

"I- my mum and dad split when I was ten, not really a big deal I didn't see them much anyway." You inhaled a shaky breath as you looked at the caramel coloured wall in front of you. "My dad moved to Boston with his music company, mum stuck around until I was fifteen before she moved to Europe." You turned to look at the tan girl by your side, she nodded, sympathy and concern swirling around pools of chocolate. "They both have amazing jobs, so I was fantastic financially, my house is huge actually, too big for one person, anyway dad moved and mum moved they both send me checks every month with more than enough money." You bit back a sob as you spoke again. "My dad remarried when I was 12 he has two kids and a wife now, mum has some kind of ToyBoy in Paris and well I never hear from them, not at Christmas or my birthday, just when the check comes in the mail. Dad came back to ask me if I wanted to sign with his label in Boston." Sobs shook through your cold body as you collapsed into warm arms. Heat instantly clouding around you, you already felt the liquid that stuck to your skin begin to evaporate as you curled into a warm body. Hands automatically clutched to your back as sweet nothings were mumbled in your hair, you're not too sure how long you stayed there, crying into Tori's shoulder, curled around her warm body but eventually she removed you from her and led you to her bedroom.

You remember her attempting to dry your damp hair and how she delicately dressed you in sweats and a tshirt and lay you down on silk sheets. They smelled of lavender and assumed it was to help her sleep. What you remember most clearly is how she crawled in next to you and pulled you towards her as you curled around her. Shivering as her warmth melted your cold skin. As her hands protectively wrapped around you, eyes fluttering shut as she pressed a soft kiss to your head. She said nothing as sheets were pulled over bodies and light was turned to darkness. You heard her sigh once more before she spoke for the first time that night.

"I never knew that was how you lived Jade, a part of me is sorry for you but a part of me is also envious. I don't know how your parents could act like that towards such a wonderful girl," Hot hands massaged your scalp as she spoke, a soft velvet sound meeting your ears. "I feel like now I know why you're always so cold, you don't need to be. A little warmth isn't deadly and I think it may be what you need. Another sigh escaped her lips as you closed your eyes. "I'm not sure why you came here Jade and I don't think I'll ever know, but thank you." She placed another soft kiss atop your head as strong arms closed around you.

For the first time in your life, you felt the ice begin to thaw and your heart begin to pelt against your ribs as you fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Okay so here is chapter five, I try to update as much as possible, I want to thank everyone who has reviewed/followed/favourited(never could spell that word) it means a lot. I liked writing this chapter a lot! Its fluffy and we see a new side of Tori!**

**Slán**

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Chapter five.

You like to call them 'Incidents', on the nights you find yourself in Tori's bed. Since that night a week ago, you find yourself here every night, in the same position, crying and clawing onto Tori as if you're drowning and she is the last life jacket. You don't have a repeat of what happened in the BlackBox Theatre. You don't even really talk, you always leave before she wakes up. You act normally in school, you throw vicious words towards her and she shrugs them off with a smile. You do this because you like to think nothing has changed, although you know fine rightly it has. You knew that night when she kissed you and you have just proven it by curling into her side every night for the past week. For some strange reason, you couldn't help yourself. She was so inviting and warm and she didn't question you, she just opened her strong arms and let you in. You like it because she doesn't ask questions she just holds you as you sob, she coos sweet words much like she had on the first night, and holds you throughout sleep. You like it because even though she is warm and could easily melt you, she doesn't try and that strangely comforts you. She expects you now, she has the purple pillow you like laid on the side of the bed nearest the wall and a glass of water for when your throat dries up. She cares even if she tries not to show it and it scares you.

Tonight you come earlier than you have been. Your father was home again, he was collecting some old photo albums, you didn't talk, you screamed at him and he sighed, muttering something that sounded like '_offer still stands_.' You ran this time, you normally drive. But you like to run, it allows you a sense of freedom, it burns your lungs and you like the feeling of wind in your hair. So you aren't surprised when Trina, the eldest Vega sister opens the door and tells you Tori is in her room. The Vega's had become used to your late night visits, normally it would make you uneasy that Trina knew, but you had a feeling that she was frightened of you.

Your took the stairs two at a time, boots trudging against the soft carpet, your eyes began to burn , you could feel the tear ducts start to open when you reached Tori's room. You didn't knock and walked on in, a long tear smudging your black eye make-up. A small, barely audible gasp escaped your mouth as you took in the sight before you. Tori Vega was stretched as she pulled a simple white shirt over her head. Your attention should have went to her breasts but it was something on the underside of her left breast that caught your attention. There was a scrawling in black ink, four letters, but you couldn't quite make out what it said. Just as you tore your eyes away, the shirt had fallen the rest of the way over a tan, toned torso. Blue eyes melted with a pair of coffee couloured ones, and you opened your mouth to speak.

"I never saw anything I swear." You muttered as your eyes downcast and you sighed.

"Jade, it's okay, I like my body anyway so." That velvet voice spoke in a gentle manner that you had become so accustomed to. You didn't need any more words as she sat on purple silk sheets and motioned for you to come forward. You removed your boots and fell into a warm embrace. Cold tears spilling from your eyes as your head rested between a warm shoulder and next. Arms protectively wrapped around your body and you relaxed. It irked you because you had never felt so secure. Not with your parents, not with Beck, not with anyone. You shouldn't feel secure with Tori Vega of all people, again your mind screamed _'__This is wrong!' _Your mind always had a different opinion to your body when it came to Tori, and you couldn't put your finger on it yet.

A warm hand began to rub your lower back, in a motherly fashion. Tori cooed words like "_It's okay_." And "_I'm here_." As she held you in a tight embrace, your tears soaking her shirt. Hesitantly you raised a hand and placed it on her warm torso, over her shirt. Throughout this past week, Tori had held you but you, yourself kept the contact to a minimum, you hardly ever touched her because you _wanted _to. You felt that blaze across your hand and travel up your arm as you laid your hand flat on her stomach. Muscles tensed on her abdomen, normally you had smirked, but this wasn't _normal. _

"Tori, what does your tattoo say?" You quizzed before you even realized you spoke aloud. If Tori was shocked or violated and she didn't display it, her hand continued its motions on your lower back.

"It says _free_." You felt Tori's hot breath on your hair as she spoke. Soft words, no malice, no venom. Just something that was _so Tori_.

"Why did you get it?" Another question, you shocked yourself this time by asking.

"I got it cos I had always wanted one, Trina paid for it actually, and um because it's something I aspire to be." A hint of shyness crawled into Tori's voice as she spoke, and you gently began moving your index finger in a circular motion on her stomach.

"Don't you feel free?" Another tear slid down your cheek as you thought of pure freedom. Sure you had no ties to parents, no responsibilities but you weren't free.

"No." A sharp exhale. "I never have, there's always been something keeping me from utter freedom you know? Something at the gates that never lets me pass." You felt her arms tighten around you, as though she were trying to keep herself together.

"Do you feel alone?" You tilted your head as you asked this question, meeting those chocolate eyes you felt yourself being drawn to. Nothing but honesty and sorrow filled them and you had the urge to hold her, but you held yourself back. You wanted to kick yourself because you had never seen anything so pure.

"I-I met this girl at camp a couple of years ago." She stopped noticing the confusion in your eyes and you saw a pleading look in her own. "I was fourteen, so was she, her name was Ciara. She had this aura that was so inviting that I couldn't stay away. You know like magnets. For six weeks Ciara was my world I know, weird for a fourteen year old. But I found myself having these_ feeling_s for Ciara." An intake of air as her brows knitted together. "I knew it was a crush, I freaked out. I never acted on them, she meant a lot and I couldn't risk it." Tears lined Tori's eye and you acted on instinct and cupped her cheek, willing her to continue. "Anyway, she left camp as we all did, I never heard from her, never expected to. I met her when I visited my Grandpa in Dallas two years ago and she asked me if I felt alone, just like you had." A tear spilled from Tori's eye and you found yourself gently wiping them away as she spoke again. "I told her I didn't know and Ciara had said, _'__Alone is what you are and lonely is how you feel but something you don't deserve__'_and she walked away, so I guess I do feel alone and I'm just trying to feel okay again." A bitter chuckle escaped Tori's mouth as you starred at her, in awe. You didn't feel worthy of this information. You didn't understand where this honestly had come from, where this _need _to speak about things had come from, in the most bittersweet way you were glad you had chosen to speak.

A shaky breath left your mouth as your hand cupped Tori's cheek, brown eyes bore into your own and you couldn't think of anything else to do and you acted on impulse.

Lips. Soft, plump, simple lips flush against each other. As if this were the first time you had done this. The first time you had felt that over whelming heat, that inviting softness, your sense were alight as your cupped her face, her hands placed firmly on your lower back. You could feel her smiling, but you could taste your tears and you're not sure whether you felt happy or sad. Happy because you made her smile, or sad because you made her cry. Your mind screeched, _'__Jade stop this!'_ You simply didn't listen and continued kissing the heat, letting the suffocating warmth take you, feeling it sink into your pores drowning your being, sinking its teeth into your nerves, turning your skin to fire, enveloping your organs in a warmth you had never experienced before. It was intoxicating, you were on a high and you're not sure if you ever wanted to come down.

As you parted, lukewarm breath the only barrier between you and Tori, the first genuine smile to graze your lips in weeks appeared, as you rested your head against Tori's gazing into pools of coffee. You couldn't help the words that escaped your mouth in a soft whisper. You wish you could have stopped them, they felt _so _right as you said them, but somewhere, something within you was erupting, shouting at you to bite your tongue and you ignored it.

"You never have to be alone."


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: This is smutty and the longest chapter yet and I liked writing it. I enjoy the Jade/Tori interaction in this. I love the reaction to this and I love to hear what you guys reckon! Review if you like, review if you don't. **

**Slán**

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Chapter Six.

You find yourself in Tori's bed, every night, like clockwork. You refrain from speaking again. You sob and she holds you. She envelopes you in warmth and you tickle her with cool breath. It's almost as if you opened one door and closed another. You feel exposed, almost, as you lay in Tori's arms. You felt a shift within when you kissed her again, after she let you in. A voice in your head that wouldn't leave you alone constantly screamed at you to leave Tori alone. To walk away and never go back to her, to leave her. For some fucked up reason you didn't understand, you couldn't walk away and that irked you more than anything. You couldn't walk away after her confession, not after she told you how alone she really was. You were supposed to _hate _her, not want to jump her bones. You were supposed to rip her apart with vicious words not _kiss _her, and you certainly weren't meant to crawl into her strong arms. You were like a corpse in her arms. So small, cold and fragile, as though one flick and you would fall apart, bone from bone. She was mighty, strong and warm, and with one flick she could make you fall apart, god knows she should _want_ to. But she doesn't and you're not sure if you're relieved or concerned. Your mind warns you, it tells you; '_Jade, you're treading on dangerous land.'_ But you don't care and you continue to tread. You tread until your feet are firmly planted on her lava drenched land, burning your cool skin and you find yourself wishing you had listened to your mind.

Sikowitz is talking to you and it's then that you remember that you're in class. You can't remember driving here and that's pretty much it, you don't pay attention to much in school. You do your work and you leave. It's then that you realize you have a lock of red in your hand and a pair of scissors in the other. You almost laugh aloud as you realize you have a lock of Cat's hair, but she is looking at you with a happy smile, a stuffed giraffe in her arms.

"Jade, cut your friends hair in your _own_ time." Then he continues to lecture the class about Ingrid Bergman and Grace Kelly. You're not sure why he's talking about them, but you don't question it, the man is fucking crazy. You stroke the lock of hair in your hand, as you gaze around the room. André is drumming a beat on his thigh with his fingers, Cat is looking longingly out the window while stroking her stuffed giraffe. Robbie has that stupid puppet on his lap while listening to Sikowitz. You stop at Beck, his hair brushing his shoulders now, he needs a haircut, he has facial hair now as well and you compare kissing him to kissing Tori-

_Tori._

Your thoughts change track, as you look around frantically and that's when you notice that she isn't present. She never misses class, she never ever misses one of Sikowitz class. You shove your scissors down your boot, grab your bag and leave the class room, not bothering to excuse yourself, you can deal with that later. You're not sure where you're going, your feet carry you almost on auto pilot through the hall ways of Hollywood Arts, heavy boots stomping along the smooth floors. It's when you reach her locker that you stop. It's still glowing. But what is written in the center makes your face turn red with rage and you aren't sure why. Smudged red paint graces the surface of her locker, it looks like someone tried washing it off. If it were a normal situation you would have laughed, but this is Tori and nothing about Tori is normal anymore. You step closer, hand tracing over the red paint. '_Make it Gay'. _Like you thought, normally you would have laughed, it was a pretty lame joke, you could have written something better. But rage erupted within you, and it makes you uneasy. You punch the locker, almost as if you hoped it would punch the words away. That they would fall, crash and burn. That's when you realize why she isn't at school. Tori always comes to school early, she must have seen it, tried washing it and went back home. The rage you feel intensifies as you imagine the look of sheer pain in her brown orbs and before you can think twice about, your body acts on its own accord and you're running to the parking lot.

You press hard on the accelerator, you don't know how many red lights you run, you don't care either. All you know is you _have_ to see Tori. You're not sure why, or where you're going with this, but something within you is pulling you towards her and that's when you feel that _fucking _magnetic force again. The drive to her house is silent, your thoughts are working on over drive that it doesn't even seem like you're thinking at all. You pull up in front of her house and sprint to her back yard. There's a tree that to you climb that leads to a balcony that leads to her room. Why you climbed, you'll never know. You could have knocked the door and got in just as easily. You stop outside the door that leads to her room. Her room, that smelled of lavender and the raspberry shampoo she uses. A strong pain strikes it's away through your chest as you look at her, she sat at her dresser, starring blanking at herself in the mirror. You don't want to think of the thoughts that are going through her head, so you inhale a generous breath of air and open her door.

She doesn't flinch. She doesn't gasp. She doesn't jump from her hair and clutch her chest in surprise. Instead she meets your eyes in the mirror. There it is. That look you knew she'd have. It makes you cower almost, it's so intense. It's full of sadness, shock and horror. A look you'd never seen on her, you knew Tori Vega was so sure of herself, she had no need to feel sad, shocked or frightened. Until today. You take small, tentative steps towards her, never breaking that eye contact. You felt as though she was melting your soul. The closer you got to her, the more you felt the burn. You whimpered as she starred you down. You were so close to her you could feel her heat, her eyes bore into your own still. You don't speak, you look at her and raise your hand to her shoulder. Her body goes rigid and you notice. Tori has never reacted to your touch in such a way. Sure sometimes your insults made her wince, but she never went rigid when you touched her. A sharp intake of breath enters her mouth and she breaks eye contact.

It dawns on you then, that you didn't know what you came here for, you simply knew you _had _to see her. You remove your hand, and you begin to pace as you speak.

"I _had_ to see you." You say as she finally turns to look at you. Her brown orbs are lined with tears and you want to kiss them away but you know now is not the time. Her eyes suddenly change as she looks at you. Confusion, sadness, anger all swirl around those coffee coloured eyes. She stands, the rage clear on her soft features.

"What, so you could _mock_ me? Tell me how much of a _fucking_ freak I am? How you can't believe you've been sleeping in a bed with s-some _dyke_?" She spits and you gasp, because this is Tori Vega and she does not swear or cry, especially not in front of Jade West. The rage flashed around in her eyes and she walking towards you and you _need _to speak. You _have _to speak. She's around a feet away from you, when you speak your voice firm.

"No Vega. Stop being such an ass. I came here because I fucking saw you weren't in class. So I ran to see where you were and then I saw your locker.." There's that undying sadness in her eyes. "I freaked out and I came here and I don't know why. I _had_ to know you were ok." You sigh, running a hand through your raven locks as she takes a small barely noticeable step closer to you, that warmth forever getting strong, your exterior forever getting weaker.

"Bullshit." She growls, teeth clenched, there is so much anger when you meet her eyes. She takes another step closer, she's almost in your personal space. "You came to mock me, you get some kind of sick kick out of seeing others hurt." Her brows are furrowed and you're not sure if you've ever seen anything so intriguing before.

"What have I got to do to prove that I came here to see if _you_." You put emphasis on the word, as you pause. "Were ok?" and suddenly she is a hair away from your face. You can see her mind running at a thousand miles an hour as she studies your face. That heat radiating from her, seeping into her pores.

"Stop the hurting." Her voice is small again, but her breath is hot and her lips are right _there_.

"I can't promise." You mutter.

"Ok."

Suddenly plump lips are flush against your own and hot hands are scaring the back of your neck as she kisses you. You're not sure who made the move but you don't care either, because heat is enveloping you and throwing you into an abyss of pleasure and you can't help the moan that escapes your lips as a warm, wet tongue battles with your own. Your hands clutch desperately at her hips, pushing her shirt up and giving you more skin to caress. As expected it's hot. Then your mouth is cold again as her head dips and small nips re placed along your neck. You really cannot help the response, your hips buck upward into her own, your hands squeeze and your breath catches in your throat. She's nipping and licking your neck and that fucking voice comes back '_Jade stop, you'll just hurt her.' _You ignore it and instead push Tori away and onto her silk sheets, you have become to love to sleep in.

She lands with a thump as you straddle her, removing your top in the process. One hand automatically goes to your neck as she pulls you into her for a kiss. Her other hand is pressed lightly to your abdomen and you can't help the flush of wetness that over comes you as she stroke your abdomen lightly. You can't take it, so you pull away and pull her up. Removing her top, gazing not so subtly at the tan abs that are exposed to you. Her bra follows not soon after your own, her breath hitches at the sight of your breasts and you can't help but smirk as you kiss her. Her hands roam and pinch your nipples while kneading your breast, again another moan and you aren't ashamed, it feels too good. Her hands burn your skin, scaring you, leaving trails of where she's been, marking her territory.

You gasp when she abruptly tugs your jeans off your legs and flips you onto your back all the while, still kissing you. You feel her bare skin on your own and the sensation is so over whelming. She's so soft and inviting nothing at all like Beck. She sucks harshly on your nipples as you tangle pale fingers into auburn coloured hair. Hips bucking to her own and that's when you feel it. She's naked. You don't have long to dwell on it as she's nipping your nipples and slowly slinking south wards down your body. With a kiss to each hip she looks at you through hooded eyes, knowing what's to come, you nod. She looks her fingers into your underwear and tugs them down your legs. You gasp as cool air connects with your center, a clear indication that are _soaked. _She stares at you in are, want in her eyes, normally it would have made you uneasy. But this isn't normal and you feel desired and lusted after.

"_You're drenched." _Tori all but purrs as she runs a long slender, hot, finger through your slit, collecting warm heat. You weren't prepared for what came next. She met your eyes and lifted her finger to her lips and sucked it, in the most sensual manner you had ever seen. As you gazed into her eyes, you felt cared for. You never felt cared for with Beck. She moans and before you know it her head is between your legs and your hands are back in her hair. Hot lips latch onto your clit, sucking and every so often a tongue would lick. The pleasure you were feeling was on a whole other level. Every one of your nerves were sight alight by the queen of fire. Two slender fingers thrust inside your center. Blazing your soft tissues, rubbing you in a way you had never felt before. The moans that escaped you were loud and very sensual. Your hips bucked and you felt yourself clench, it wouldn't be long. Three more thrusts and a lick of the clit and you were sent tumbling into an endless abyss of pleasure. And one word uttered on your lips.

"_Tori." _You moan as she removes herself from your lower half and tugs you with her beneath the silk sheets, bodies slick with sweat and heads swirling with questions. She pulls you into her side, your head on her shoulder, legs tangled, arms slung around waists, breathing heavy and air steamy.

"That was-" You begin seemingly unable to talk

"I know." She retorts almost cockily, you lightly kick her and she giggles, a sound you once hated and now found yourself wanting to hear more.

"I'm glad I came." You mumbled into her neck, kissing her hot flash lightly. Before laughter erupted from the both you.

"Me too." She said, her breath hot against your lips as she kissed you.

That was the first time you found yourself with dry eyes in the arms of Tori Vega. It should have scarred, but by this point you assumed you couldn't be so afraid of the heat if you brought you such mind blowing pleasure. You found yourself holding her closer, not caring if she burnt your skin, because the ice had already began to thaw.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I'm having some serious writers block so bear with me if this chapter is kind of shitty. Plus I wrote it at 3am while listening to terribly good Taylor Swift songs, cut me some slack! Thanks for the reviews/Favs/Follows! Also I'm thinking of writing another few chapters and having a time jump, maybe when they're at the age of 23 or so? Let me know what you guys think!**

**Slán. **

Chapter Seven.

Most people would have described what you were doing with Tori as twisted, toxic, or even unnatural. For some god forsaken reason _it_ worked. You never knew why or how and neither did Tori. Almost every night went by the same. You would fall asleep in Tori's arms her warmth seeping into your pores after a night of mind blowing sex. Never did you speak of it, you would wake before she did and leave, you would be as bitter as possible in school, trying not to give anything away to your friends. Once again she would brush off your comments and get on with her day and prepare for when the moon was sat amongst the stars and you would crawl wordlessly into her arms. Everything _seemed_ normal, but _nothing_ was the same. Sure Cat still made stupid comments about her brother, Beck still needed a haircut, André was still well _André_, Robbie still had Rex and Tori well, you assumed she was different now. Not exactly a different person, just _different. _You looked at her differently now. You couldn't gaze at her without _wanting_ to caress her soft skin now that you knew how it felt, you couldn't stand to be near that warmth, yet it was _everything_ you craved. The more nights spent basking in that tan warmth the more you felt the ice thaw out, the more you lost control of your balance on the tightrope you had mastered years before. The thing you realized about Tori was that, you could be the best trapeze artist in the world, and she could be a small shred in your ribbon that would ruin everything.

André and Beck had taken care of the locker incident, they refused to tell you who it was, they refused to tell Tori who it was, they _even_ refused to tell Cat. You trusted them enough that they had taken care of it when three weeks passed and nothing more was painted on Tori's locker. No one had questioned her about what was painted on her locker, everyone knew better.

You placed a hand over your mouth as you watched Tori try to explain to André how she had received the bruises on her wrists, from your seat atop a table in the Asphalt Café. She appeared flustered and out of her element, a blush creating blemishes on her tan skin, as she fumbles for words, what she says though, completely catches everyone off guard.

"Sometimes Trina and I play cops and robbers and well she can be a bit rough." Her blush quickly disappears as she pokes at her salad.

"That's some kinky shit Vega." You say, a pierced eyebrow quirked, in reality you know exactly what kind of kink created those bruises, it included strips of silk and a very aggressive Jade West. Tori's expression turned to a nervous one as she spoke back.

"Whatever, I'm going to the BlackBox Theatre to work on my song for next week." She ups and leaves and you watch her go, not once thinking about following her as her hips sway.

It dark already as you climb the tree that leads to her balcony, you discovered you liked coming in this way better than using the front door. It meant you didn't have to see Trina and that you could admire Tori for a few minutes before making it known you were there.

You make your way from Tori's bedroom balcony to her room, where she lays on her bed, in nothing but panties and a tank, a copy of 'Game of Thrones' in her petite hands. You take a moment to take her in, her glasses perched on her nose, brows scrunched in concentration. You watch her for a good few minutes, just relishing in how she looked in that moment. Innocent and _beautiful._ You want to stab yourself in the eyes every time you think that about her but you can't bring yourself to stop those thoughts. That's a thing that been happening a lot lately and it enrages you, not only do you lust for Tori Vega but you think she's beautiful as well and it_ scares_ you. It scares you to the point where you feel like running but a part of you knows that that won't do any good so you continue this dance of fucking and holding each other, no matter how scared you get.

You make your presence known by slowly sliding the glass door open, letting the night air in behind you. It takes Tori a second to realize you're there, and she reluctantly drags her eyes away from the pages of her book, before softly smiling at you and meeting your eyes. The thing about Tori Vega was that everything she ever felt she portrayed in her eyes, those brown orbs that carried so many stories, a few of which you appeared, the thought made you smile.

"Hey." You whisper as you slide onto the silk sheets beside her, you can feel her warmth and you inhale shakily as you close your eyes, drowning in her lava.

"Hi." The way she says it makes you open your eyes, its different from the other ways she's greeted you this past month, that one word feels _heavy _as it hits you. You avert your eyes to look at her chocolate ones, they seem somber almost, she's sighs heavily as she stares back at you.

"I-um, not tonight Jade." Her words hit you like waves of lava, not the kind you've grown to like. The kind that burn you, scar you, in a form that isn't delicious like the way her words normally seem. You take a moment to recollect your thoughts.

"Why?" You ask, your voice sounds empty, that one word the only thing that could roll off your tongue. She breaks the stare and stands from the bed, she paces, her book still clutched in her left hand, her knuckles turning pale.

"I'm confused ok. You-you crawl into bed with me every night, you-we cuddle and then I wake and you're not here, you just _leave_ and you say it's nothing and I'm so _fucking_ confused Jade!" She stops pacing as she stares at you, those eyes burning a dark hole into your own, searching your eyes for an answer, anything that would give her an indication as to what you're feeling. You're not even sure if you are _feeling_, you forgot what it felt like to feel a long time ago.

You sigh as you run your hands through your dark hair.

"It is nothing." You tear your eyes away from hers, you can't look at her, not now, not with so much words being said and so much fire being thrown. She stands still, her book drops to the floor with a small thump, her jaw clenches.

"Bullshit Jade, if it was nothing you _wouldn't_ have started this at that party, you _wouldn't_ have continued it in the BlackBox and you certainly _wouldn't _have come here that night and kept coming." You meet her eyes and you regret it instantly. There is burning fire in her irises, flames igniting in her orbs, nothing but rage as you stand and face her, nothing more than a foot between you both.

"It doesn't matter if I say it's nothing, because it can never be anything ok Vega." You snap and take a step forward slowly closing the distance between the both of you, her nostrils flare and you get a sick kick out of it. "You know why?" She shakes her head. "Because you're pretty ,prefect, and I'm lost and used. You're fire and I'm ice and if this were a Robert Frost poem he would pair us together, but it's not and life doesn't work that way." You take another step closer and you're a hair away from her. "You're gonna keep burning, blazing your way through life and even when the fire dies out there'll still be embers, endlessly glowing. As for the ice, one day it'll thaw out and there'll be nothing but a pool of cold water, and that will eventually evaporate and a hallow hole will be left." You lightly graze her lips. "And that's why I say it's nothing, cos you're fire, I'm ice and neither of those will ever truly suffice."

You take a step back, keeping your eyes trained on her as she lifts her head to look at you. She stands still, never moving but her words are enough.

"You're scared, a pool of quicksand that pulls everything down with her, you're cold, so cold." She stops to breathe as if the coldness was attacking her tan body, her eyes shut. You feel your tear ducts open but your pushing back, you can't, you won't cry.

"You bite and you scream and you try to scare what scares you. You try so hard Jade, you scared Beck because he was getting somewhere. He was cracking the ice burg and you scared him and he ran. Maybe he wasn't warm enough to push all the way through. Guess fucking what, I'm not Beck and you don't scare me." She exhales almost as if she was unsure of herself. You can do nothing but watch as a lone tear runs down your face.

"You see that." And she points at your face. "You're probably fighting a million more of those tears. I wish you would stop fighting me. What more do you want?" She shrugs her shoulders. "I gave you my body, I gave you my mind. You don't talk Jade. You come, you leave, and you're silent. I was sailing freely and until I met this ice burg and I'm not afraid to throw a petrol bomb at it, even if I might get blown up in the process." Her own tears are rolling freely down her face now.

You feel this magnetic force that you've been feeling for weeks now and you give in for the first time. Those words hit you like a ton of bricks, like the wires in your mind are suddenly reconnected and your engine started working again. Your body acts on its own accord as you walk the short distance to her. You hesitantly reach a hand to her face and slowly wipe her tears, you wince as her skin burns your own.

"Is it cold?" You ask as your other hand meets her hip. She nods and another tear falls from your eyes. You bury your face in the crock of her neck, her arms encircling your waist. Sobs wreck both your forms as you stand in the middle of her room, artificial light cascading down on her tanned body, the smell of lavender in the air. You mutter one word over and over again as you cry into her neck. "Sorry."

Now you know that you're caged in a kingdom made of ice, but that there is a knight made of fire burning brightly willing to thaw out the ice and rescue the Queen.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Every time I write for this fic is at an ungodly hour and to very sad music. Many of you are saying of how 'Deep' and 'Poetic' Jade is. In my head, Jade has a lot of depth, is a very dark character. Jade questions things a lot and doesn't want to give into her desires. She's very symbolic. Tori also is very deep, but she's happier. She carries baggage but she also knows how to deal with it. Also this chapter is muddled bc it's late, and I'm a bundle of nerves as I go to get GCSE results tomorrow, holy fucking shit. Plus its mostly a filler! As always thanks for the Reviews/Favs/Follows!**

**Slán.**

Chapter Eight.

You're not really sure why you came here. You haven't been here since your mom moved away when you were 15. You wish you knew the answer, you guessed it was because this was always a place you came to when you needed to think, _really _think about things. The last time you were here you thought about how you would cope alone at the age of 15, how your parents could just abandon you. Now you're here because of Tori and because she made you feel _wanted _and far from alone.

Your feet dangled carelessly over the edge of the building, you leaned back into the space behind you, palms securely planted on the cold, concreted rooftop. The sky was clear, and dark, you assumed it was around midnight, you left Tori's at 11 and it took 40 minutes to get here. You're not sure why _here_, why _now_. Why this place when you could go home and ponder the same thoughts. You guessed up here, everything seemed insignificant, you felt massive, like a mighty king and everyone else was simply below you in rank. Like every problem you ever had didn't matter and all that did was the stars and your thoughts. The stars the only one's above you. Tonight the sky was clear and you chuckled bitterly, it was as though the universe wanted you to feel truly alone, and you did. The conversation you had with Tori was _intense._ The feelings it invoked was like nothing you'd ever felt before. You felt angry, sad, enraged, happy and confused, all at once. It was scary because you had felt nothing like that since Beck.

You sighed. Beck was always a safe option for you. He was handsome, charming, caring, Beck was a decent person. You knew the first time you seen him freshman year you _had _to have him. You succeeded. He was a first for many things. He was your first kiss, first time, first person you ever brought home, first person who made you _feel_. He scared you and so you did the first thing you could think of the protect yourself. _You scared him right back._ He was persistent at first, always pushing but not quite hard enough, always giving but not seeking enough. He started slowly melting the ice, so you fought harder against him. And he ran, it took him a while to realize he wasn't getting anywhere, but eventually he ran. A part of you will love him forever for running and another part will hate him for all eternity for running. Maybe just maybe if he had stood his ground against the Ice Queen, kept his sword pointed for a little while longer, he wouldn't have ran and you wouldn't have had to fall into the arms of Tori _fucking _Vega.

The difference between Tori and Beck became very clear tonight. Tori wasn't scared, she wasn't going to run. The coldness had chased Beck away, over powering his warmth, it appeared the cold had met it's match in Tori Vega. On the surface Tori was optimism and happiness in a nutshell but underneath as the layers of concrete created by her ever erupting volcano, laid anger, frustration and confusion. It took you a while to realize it but you did. Tori was everything you hated, everything you weren't supposed to want but you did. It irked you to the highest degree. Tori was everywhere. She was in your head, under your skin, on your lips and now in your safe place. You couldn't escape. A part of you, the _weak_ part didn't want to escape. You knew how her plump lips felt as they melted against your own, you knew how her finger tips felt as they trailed along your body, you knew every curve of her body and the thought alone made you wince. You were never meant to let her know you even had the simplest attraction to her burning warmth but she knew now and there was nothing you could do. Worst of all was how she felt, _mentally._ You knew now that she wasn't going to run, that she was going to ram through your ribcage on her chariot of fire and stab you in the heart in the most pleasing way. It was in her kiss, in her fingertips. Everything about her screamed: '_Run! You're thawing! You Can't Jade!' _But you never listened, you indulged in her despite what your mind thought. Despite the ache her burning brought you, you always wanted more. Everything was bittersweet when it came to her. You had no answers, you wanted to run, to crawl safely into your icy abyss but she was halfway through and with each encounter she was melting more of you. You couldn't find it in yourself to fight her anymore.

She was almost irresistible. _Almost_. No matter how many times you felt that magnetic pull you refrained from giving in, until tonight. Tonight every card was laid on the table. You lied and she saw so very clearly through your façade, you told her it was nothing and she knew fine rightly it was more than nothing. She knew you were ice and she was fire but she wasn't giving up and that scared you a lot more than anything else on this planet. You thought about how scared you were when Beck got close, this was that only intensified by one hundred. Every nerve in your body set alight when she so much as stepped near you, it was _thrilling_, it made you tremble and it scared you because, as much as you _felt _with Beck, you had never _trembled_. It was a new sensation all together, you weren't sure if you loved it or hated it. Maybe it was both, maybe you needed both to feel normal. Then again nothing about Tori was normal anymore, nothing about feeling was normal anymore. Tori used to be this ray of sunshine you hated because she created rainbows after you had rained on the parade. Now, there was so much more in depth, there wasn't just hatred anymore. There was some twisted understanding. You knew how she was, how she thought, how she _felt_. Small things that shouldn't even matter but do. You knew she felt alone and longed for freedom, you knew how she liked the smell of lavender and the colour purple. You knew none of those things about Beck and it worried you. Weren't you supposed to know Beck's favorite colour? If Beck felt alone? You couldn't bring yourself to care about Beck because everything in your life was now Tori-centric.

Every thought involved Tori, everywhere you went you wondered about Tori, at school, at home, and now here. You sighed. You wanted so_ badly_ to fight her but with every encounter you felt yourself giving in more and more. You felt yourself slowly slipping into the warmth, willingly letting it seep into your pores and letting it take you.

Still you relented, you got a kick out of knowing she would fight for you, she wouldn't give up easily and that in itself was thrilling.

You tossed your head back as you starred at the sky, it was still clear, but you knew come morning a raging ball of fire would perch high and clearly in the sky and for once it didn't scare you so much.


End file.
